Let the countdown begin!

There are only 4 weeks left in my pregnancy. I want to rush them and wish it away because it's getting harder to be me every day. I struggle with prioritizing chores and errands that need to be done because I am HUGE. My capabilities are cut in half and I am supposed to be taking it a bit easy.
I don't necessarily want to rush through these last weeks. It's just that they are very hard to deal with when you are a fidgety, antsy person who is used to doing everything she pleases.
I think about this baby. I wonder what she is going to look like. How much hair she will have at birth and if she will be perfect as Bella was?
I so look forward to those tender moments shared while nursing a baby. I want to ward away the discomforts that plagued me last time, like the mastitis, the episiotomy and the muscle weakness.
I have been more relaxed this week. Tommy has given me chances to rest in between nesting and caring for Bella that have settled my tension and eased my arm pain. Praise Tommy! I needed that and the truth is we will both need to continue that pampering of each other when possible after the baby.
We are taking a trip to Florida to visit family and take a break. The break is for us both before the storm.
I pray all turns out the way we plan and that the break will be as enjoyable as we both deserve.
I'll also be wearing my first maternity bathing suit and that's laughable to me, but I'm looking forward to it.

Memorial Day fun

We went to Tweetsie Railroad with a bunch of close friends during our holiday. It was a good time had by all. The only thing I wish I would have done differently is have Bella go on more rides and take better pictures. It was a little difficult to get 10 people to agree on what they all wanted to do at the same time.

Nonetheless, it was pure family fun and Bella was adorable the whole time. I'm so proud of her.

The first thing we did once we got there was ride the big train around the mountain and watch the cowboys and Indians pretend to fight. The gunfire made Bella very nervous and at one point she looked at me, eyes full of tears and whimpered "Let's... go... home," it was pitiful. But, the rest of the trip she relished every opportunity to play and have fun with her daddy and her friends that came along.

Paci update:

Bella still asks for her paci stub but it is of no use to her. She's stopped crying at night when we put her to bed and she seems very secure about the whole thing. The stub will have to go.

Bye Bye Paci!!

I have braved the battle and made my second attempt at helping Bella give up the pacifier.

She is such a big, smart girl and she's too old for it. The new baby will probably use one and I know that may be an issue, but I think when she sees that little babies need them and big girls don't, she'll understand.

I cut the round part off her paci.

She didn't see me do it, I handed it to her as usual and she knew this was different.

She pretended it was fine with her for a while and then when it was time to sleep...she flipped out.

It broke our hearts.

She threw it across the room a few times and I went in very calmly and picked it up. After a while she stopped asking for her 'pink' paci, the one she knew had a whole sucking end.

I never gave in and Tommy helped me stick to it.

We shall see what tonight brings. But, her life should be smooth sailing until the baby is born and I figure that's enough time to spring this new habit on her.

Yes, she still has half a paci. I do want her to give that up too. I know soon she will be willing to trade that stump of a paci for a shiny new snugly toy.

I am ready... I think.

34 weeks gone...

Tommy and I are eagerly awaiting the new baby and it won't be very much longer! We have only approximately 6 weeks to wait. The actual due date is estimated to be either June 28th or July 1st.
As far as my pregnant body goes; I gained less weight than I did last pregnancy so far, I can safely say this time I was much more sick and sore yet more apt to want to enjoy it rather than wish it away.
This pregnancy is flying by, having a 2-year-old during a pregnancy takes my mind off the daily waiting to see progress and helps me remember to stop every now and then and feel, bond and recognize what I'm doing.
Tomorrow we're having a yard sale to rid the corners of our house of clutter. This will lead to the baby's room being cleared and ready for the crib and other furnishings that are on the way.
It's all very surreal at this point. I don't know what to expect so I expect the worst, naturally. I get nervous but then I really try to enjoy the way things are right now and say to myself, 6 weeks = 42 days and I have to take them one at a time.
Dang, 42 days! That's not long at ALL.

WTF

Highly unusual...

ATHENS, Greece (AP) -- A nine-year-old girl who went to hospital suffering from stomach pains was found to be carrying her embryonic twin, doctors in central Greece said Thursday.
Doctors at Larissa General Hospital examined the girl and surgically removed a growth they later discovered was an embryo about six centimeters (more than two inches) long.
"They could see on the right side that her belly was swollen, but they couldn't suspect that this tumor would hide an embryo," hospital director Iakovos Brouskelis said.
The girl has made a full recovery, he said.
Andreas Markou, head of the hospital's pediatric department, said the embryo was a formed fetus with a head, hair and eyes, but no brain or umbilical cord.
Markou said cases where one of a set of twins absorbs the other in the womb occur in one of 500,000 live births.
The girl's family did not want to be identified, hospital officials said.

Improvise

As I sat at my desk eating cereal with a fork this morning because there were no spoons, I realized I'm going to be doing a lot of improvising for quite a while.
Reporting to my job every morning is painful. My arm pain that was diagnosed as TMS is back. I don't know why, but it came back right when my mother said she was going to Hawaii.
I certainly didn't improvise being nice about that but somehow my body reacted. This may not be TMS.
This may be hormonal. My tendons are drunk with relaxin and have the right to be sensitive at this point. But, why when I sleep?
My morning:
Wake in pain throughout the wee hours before dawn.
Eventually look at clock if arm will support body without me crying in pain.
Tear off Velcro on carpel tunnel splints that I have to wear because my damn fingers hurt.
Place feet on the floor and rise to standing position cursing the Lord for giving me this pain AGAIN to handle without medication.
Find toilet.
Think to self when will this go away? I can't go through this with a new baby. Why did it chose me?
Get showered and dressed without hurting right arm more. Left arm seems to move with pain too.
Brush teeth. Think to self am I going to have to brush with my left hand...that's not possible.
Fix hair.
Stretch...and think, let's go little arm I don't have the patience for this.
It's either work through the pain or lay back down and cry about it.

The day continues and I continue to improvise... directing myself: "be the happy go lucky worker, mother and woman who feels no pain."

Throughout the day the arm pain will come and go as though it's warmed up and the muscles or tendons are feeling better.
But, I know that in the morning it will be there again and soon I am going to crack and really get fed up. I feel myself very close to that now.

Celebrate!

Happy Anniversary to us!

Today is our 3rd anniversary. In that short amount of time we have really done a lot. We've actually been together 6+ years so when we got married we were eager to begin our family.

Soon the 2 that were married 3 years ago will be a family of 4. Bella has brought us more happiness and love of life than anything in the world so, this baby will definitely be the icing on the cake. She will complete our family and we can continue to show both girls the joys of life and do the things we've dreamed of doing as a family.

The best part of being married is the friend you have right beside you through and through. Tommy and I figured out early on that married life will be very sweet as long as love comes out in the words we speak to one another and understanding never leaves the room.

The friendship is deep and makes me feel secure and I miss him when he's not with me.

Getting married 3 years ago, I had no clue what kind of wife I would be or what it took to make this work. But, now it's my pleasure to find more ways to show Tommy how happy I am . I enjoy being his and his wife. I need to know that we are doing the right things to make this marriage work.

As far as I'm concerned we've done it.

Yay us!

I love you Babe.

Have a great day... I'll see you at dinner.

2 posts in one day...Wow!

Here's the bathroom of the addition that's remains ALMOST done.

And, a rare picture, our newly added bedroom. I say rare because how often do people take pics of where they sleep and post them on a blog? I'd say, not very many... on a G rated blog. The wall on the top right are where a rocking recliner and pack and play will soon reside. The future resting spot of Victoria.

A welcoming of Spring... that's now in full bloom.

A precious moment trying to foof off the dandelion seeds.
Come on Thomasina, it's back to the rest home. Ha!

I admit the 3 pics above are from Easter. It's never too late, right?

Happy Early Mother's Day

Julie Racano, this is your life. You are 33 weeks pregnant and you have a 2-year-old. What the heck are you going to do now?
Love it!
I feel like a special member of a society on Mother's day. I think of all the handmade gifts and cards I used to make my mom and I so look forward to getting those from my girls. I don't always recognize that the day is also for me, a mother. I feel stressed because it's a week packed full of hubub.
Mother's Day gets drowned out with driving and buying and rushing and mailing. Really, all it is is an attempt at making people stop and realize that thier mother deserves a moment of respect and attention for the triumph of motherhood.
I have a lot of mothers to attend to. Not all are my mother, of course. But, they are all very special.

Mom
Charleen
Grandmother
Grandmother Chris
Mamaw
Grandma Racano
Tommy's mom

Happy Early Mother's day to all of you!

Reaching

Lately I've wanted to write something positive and fun and post some pics on this blog. However, I continue to forget to bring the camera to download new pics and I have to scrape through the sour part of my brain and get to the sweet stuff.

Here are some positives that I came up with:
**The addition and it's clean-up are ALMOST done. Slowly, but surely , we are getting things back together and the addition is breathtaking.
**The sunny weather is allowing our lawn and "garden" to grow in and looks pretty normal.
**Work is not too terribly stressful this week. I'm able to let myself work at a pace that normally wouldn't be acceptable.
**My time spent in the office chair is more enjoyable than time spent up and walking, this is normally reverse. I am really getting huge and the bones in my feet sometimes feel as though they might puncture the skin on the bottom of my foot when I walk too much.
**Bella is talking more and more. She loves on me and tells me she likes me and that I am her friend. Awww, what a girl!
**My Mom being gone made me realize that she and Bella may have needed a break from each other. My Mom is awesome with her. She doesn't drive and no one usually comes over so they are pretty much in the same place all day, every day, until we pick her up.
**The baby in my belly is strong and perfect in size. She tries to put her foot through the side of my uterus sometimes and even though it hurts mildly, I enjoy it. I just can't wait to bond with her too.
**My husband has been put through some of my hormonal rages lately and he survived. That's a positive, right? My rages are short usually or long bouts of crying. It's pretty unnerving even to me, but it is what it is.
**Tommy makes me feel safe and good. I still would have been a lost soul with even more anger issues if not for him.

There are positives everywhere and I need to soak them in. This is the EASY part of being a Mom, that I know.
With luck and positive thoughts, things will be more fun and enjoyable.
I just found my new motto... if I can remember it.